Khan

IT STARTED IN MY GUT –GUILT AND SORROW LIKE A DRAGON’S EGG GREW IN MY BELLY -HOT LAVA THAT CHURNED LIKE THE CENTER OF THE EARTH. IT SPREAD OUT, FILLED MY WINDPIPE, CHOKED AWAY MY WILL; ACID GNAWING AT MY THROAT LIKE A THOUSAND CANCERS. I AWAKENED TO THE BITTER TASTE OF IT. -COUGHED THE ACRID SWILL THAT FLOODED MY AIRWAY UNTIL FINALLY I COULD BREATHE AGAIN.
MY BODY ACHED; EVERY JOINT, EVERY MUSCLE CRIED OUT. I TRIED TO STRETCH AWAY THE PAIN, BUT IT WOULDN’T GO. IT WOULDN’T GO BECAUSE IT’S DEEPER THAN MUSCLE; IT WOULDN’T GO BECAUSE I CARRIED THE WEIGHT OF THE WHOLE WORLD ON MY BACK AND IT WAS CRUSHING ME. BECAUSE IT HURTS IN MY SOUL, AND I’M TOO DAMNED OLD –MY BODY TOO BRUTALIZED, TOO TIRED TO STOP IT.
“YOU LOOK LIKE HELL”
A SPECTRAL VOICE CALLED OUT FROM ACROSS THE ROOM. IT WAS HIM AGAIN; THE GHOST OF MY ONE TRUE FRIEND, GUSTAVO JIMENEZ. THE HUGE SILHOUETTE FILLED THE DOORWAY, THE STENCH OF RANCID MEAT –OF STALE PUTRID BLOOD FILLED MY NOSTRILS, AND MY SKIN CRAWLED, LIKE A MILLION FAT FLESHY MAGGOTS TRIED TO BURROW THEIR WAY IN. I WANT TO PUKE AGAIN, I NEED TO. HIS ONCE OLIVE SKINNED FACE IS NOW SUN DRIED LEATHER AND PULLS AWAY FROM HIS SHARP DAGGER TEETH IN A PERMANENT MORBID GRIN. HIS HAIR A WILD MOP OF BROWN AND GRAY THAT DANCED FORLORNLY IN THE NIGHT BREEZE. I TRIED TO SMILE, “I LOOK LIKE HELL? LOOK WHO’S TALKING.”